let's think about some things...

Street sweepers @ 2:18 in the morning!

people who assume the identities of others while retelling things that happened to them earlier that day! "and she was like "scuse me but... whatever!" and I was just like, "really? really. really?"

privacy! does it matter? answer: YESSSSS

This cat took a picture of you and uploaded it on facebook!


BUT... This is the cat who ended up looking at it!


BE CAREFUL!!


playing video games from your bed! rock on!!!

being awake and not able to concentrate on the task at hand! "and so i was like '...' oh i don't remember!?'"

just the right amount of chill in the air to keep you awake..............

funny isn't it how when someone says "we should do this more often" you don't want to?!?!?!?!?!?!!!!

it's not even that laaaaaaaaaaaaaaaate

i'm sorry, you aren't any better for reading this.

George Elliot's The Lifted Veil

“Do I despise it?” she answered, taking hold of a delicate gold chain which she always wore round her neck and drawing out the end from her bosom with my ring hanging to it; “it hurts me a little, I can tell you,” she said,with her usual dubious smile, “to wear it in that secret place; and since your poetical nature is so stupid as to prefer a more public position, I shall not endure the pain any longer.”

hello everyon

Hello and welcome to another exciting blog post!

This week I participated in some male modeling for a local fashion periodical, mini zine, whatever have you. It was pretty fun and I'm excited to see how the pictures turned out.

Tomorrow I'll be calculating the scores for my friend's mock beauty pageant. I say "mock" because it's just about having fun and doing silly stuff (according to my only source).

Besides that, the weather was awesome today, and hopefully I'll receive something in the mail soon from a longtime friend who lives far away.

here are some pictures since I really don't have much to tell you...

Hey girls! Do you like having fun? This person sure does!

The website I got that from said it was supposed to be Britney Spears. Regardless, that looks like a strange good time she's having.

Hey guys! Do you like cosplay? WELL YOU HAVE NO CHOICE TODAY!

Some friends of mine watched Sailor Moon the other day. That's all I have to say on the matter.

until next time...

i left myself alive

bedridden in the hallways of your own mind
left, right, turn
amazing feats performed by your dreams
ghosts only exist when you shower
you don't wash your face because you can't bear closing your eyes
for that long
imagining people in your bed in the morning
and your heart beats
in the morning i wake up and think about death, because i find it so incredible that i woke up at all.
one day i won't have that
let's have fun while we still can
why do you stay up all night, why do you drink until you can't see
just so you can feel good about staying in on a friday
old loves
stale romance
you've wrung your guts out enough
doused them with alcohol
and repeat
fingertips evade you
provide enough warmth for yourself
and stop asking questions that you can't answer
the emotion that you think is outside your grasp
resides in you
but you're always looking somewhere else
everyone is not looking happier than you
everyone is not as well put together
you don't see the end
worry about a future which involves people who you don't even know
stop
stay inside
stay indoors
find someone your age
leave the town and all the problems you created
less than you hoped for
and more than you deserve

where the smoke ends and your breath begins

I have nothing of importance to say at the moment. Simply just putting stuff out there.

Where do you draw the line between absorbing everything in books and realizing what they are talking about in real life? Do people who like each other really stay up all night, or do they fall asleep in the grass. Recently I've been waking up with a jolt. Not sure why. I also stay in my room a lot.

This house is way too big. Most people don't complain about something like that but it always feels empty.

I like listening to jazz. Sometimes it makes me feel all old and shit. Like, an easy listening kind of thing.

ah, it's getting colder. it's surprising to me when i move my legs and realize that there are actually warm spots on my bed, and my feet are cold.

here's a song i found today via pandora, it's by the gene harris quartet, titled, lullabye
what do you think? is that like, old people music or anything? you wanna dance or somethin? yeah? aw shucks

and picturez:

dear ladies who (don't) read this blog, I think you're all great, and you should too.


yo guys. do you like pictures of pretty girls? well "step right up and don't be shy, because you will not believe you eyes."




just kidding, keep scrolling



AH THERE SEE? have a great day everyone

dreams

a well known sheriff, valued by the community, driven to murderous ends, by being shown video evidence of his wife cheating, something he always denied. he's finally blown up, forever transformed into part of the lake cliffs. he was a huge, talking jack-o-lantern the size of a face on mt. rushmore. he says he wants an eye patch? well he isn't getting one i say and angela landsbury agrees with me.

an exotic woman, longing to make contact with a genius foreigner with low self esteem. she takes a risk of bravery and decides to test one of his inventions: the zip line. he hears a cry and rushes out to see. she is laughing, and they become friends. just then, an awful, eerie cry is let out, and everyone fears the worst, that the celestial beings who created the island have decided to destroy it all by unleashing a tonal frequency which causes the molecules in everything to slowly melt. helpless, their bodies begin to slowly melt and fall upon each other. (the dream ended, but it wasn't a very interesting ending)

finally, i dreamt that i was in a huge old house and none of the light worked. the ceiling however was about fifty feet above me and whoever else was there. all of the sudden, with a powerful pound of thunder, it was torn off of the rafters, and for a second we saw the sky and it's terrible storm. then the roof fell down again and i was thrown backwards onto all sorts of things that hurt.

the third tier of being young

"No one wants to date in the fall" I told her. "Hell, people don't even know what they're getting themselves into during the summer. It's when it ends that you consider whether or not it's going to go anywhere after that." She wasn't paying attention to me by then, probably zoning me out having heard my rants before. "Why do you do this?" she said, "You act like you've got it all figured out. You're just closing doors and trying to make yourself feel better." "WHAT DO YOU KNOW?!" I yelled. "LOOK," she said "I'm tired of listening to your fucking negative bullshit. Have you noticed that we're at a party? Go talk to a girl, drink more beer, fucking go get laid. If you think that some girl's just going to walk up to you and light your heart on fire well then I feel sorry for you because you're no prize. Not when you're being an asshole like this." I couldn't help but realize the truth in her words. "It's cold out here" I said. She didn't reply. I let out a sigh and told her I was going to get more beer, but once again she wasn't paying attention. I felt bad, noticing that she was now upset. I suddenly felt incredibly guilty for bring any of it up in the first place.

meaning to everything

Are people who strive to find meaning in everything and take away some sort of sense of appreciation for every little thing destined to tangle themselves up in a never ending torment of over analysis and manic thinking? Who's to say whether or not you're able to recognize it or that you are not grown enough to understand it? I find that sometimes you just have to distract yourself, whether it be productive or not, just so that you do not wear yourself thin from building up your reality based off of a wild imagination that has the tendency to fear the worst.

Today I played some guitar, a little bit of improv/song writing and then going though some old songs I wrote. I would say that music is absolutely necessary in my life. I believe very much in the positive effects of live acoustics on the human psyche. I once played a girl to sleep in a bed four feet high. It was picturesque because my life attempts to imitate art. That's the day that we skipped class and it began to snow.

Today is Wednesday, hump day. I once saw a kid who wore a "it's humpday" shirt when it was actually Wednesday. It was obviously meant to be understood as an innuendo, some sort of shit from hollister or something. I thought it was pretty stupid.

Sometimes I don't understand why I worry about how time passes because it does anyway. It just keeps going. Sometimes I worry for minutes, one after the other, wondering whether or not you're thinking about me. Time feels infinite in my room, which is where I stay most of the time. I think about when it will start to get really cold, and I'll sit in my bed with all my clothes on and wonder why I haven't taken them off in days. Human beings need to be naked sometimes. Not just to bathe, and not just for sex, sometimes you just have to walk around naked.

SOMETIMES YOU JUST GOTTA WRITE IN A BLOG